This is clearly the President’s fault. We all know it is the job of the president to protect the secret service.
The Colbert Report
The Republican War on Women is a liberal invention, like global warming and the female orgasm.
Conan O’Brien: “It’s Super Tuesday; it’s going to be followed, tomorrow, by Oh, S— Now We’re Really Stuck With Romney Wednesday.”
The Shat, or ‘Bill’ as Colbert likes to call him, talks about his new one man Broadway show.
Jay Leno: “Rick Santorum said today that during his 16 years in Congress, he was an outsider the whole time. You know what? After 16 years, you’re not an outsider, okay? You’re just unpopular.”
Conan O’Brien: “Herman Cain’s fourth female accuser held a news conference today where she claimed Herman Cain offered her a job in exchange for sexual favors. Now say what you want about the guy. At least he has a plan to put people back to work.”
Remember kids, if you question a politician about his shady perverted past: You are a racist.
Stephen Colbert: “I will get right to the big news. Herman Cain is under attack. … Of course, when you’re top in the polls, the media digs through your past. It’s not fun but it beats being John Huntsman. No one’s even digging through his present.”